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Monday, November 26, 2012

“Feel the Fear and Do It Anyways.”


My journey in Columbus has ended.  THE LITTLE DOG LAUGHED to see such sport, and everyone from cast, crew, to audiences alike shared in the poignant hilarity.  When I left New York to do this show, an inkling to re-focus my energy into something different kept nudging me.  Obviously I’m still an actor and writer but something was calling while I was in Columbus and visiting Ann Arbor.  People were thrown in my path offering new routes to where I’m ultimately headed... as if the Universe was whispering, “Listen...” So, I did.    

And sooooo… drum roll please haha… I’m going to be back in Ann Arbor for the next 6 months or so to produce my show MY OTHER VOICE.  While I was visiting Ann Arbor during my weeks off I kept having these chance encounters with different key individuals in the artistic and health industry in and around Michigan.  Specifically, a big health movement that’s going on called, “Get Healthy Michigan” (http://gethealthymichigan.com).  This movement is one that I’m very passionate about: holistic approaches, energy healing practices, nutritional advisement, and learning how to shy away from pharmaceuticals. People are sick, suffering, and confused… yet, there are healing practices out there that many are unaware of and it’s time to reveal them.  I became immersed with the build up of energy around this topic but was stuck as to how I could help.  Then chance meetings with key professors at Michigan also started to nudge me in a different direction.  Well, two days later I get a call from the man running all of this asking if I wanted to help by producing my play in Ann Arbor.  He had seen MY OTHER VOICE in Columbus and thought it was a great way to inspire a movement.  But wait!?  I’m supposed to go back to New York!  I can’t just go to Ann Arbor!  My play has to be done in New York!  New York, New York, New York…   

My fears started protesting immediately: fear of embarking on something new, fear of making the “right” choice, and fear of failing.  So for about two days my mind went to war, weighing all the pros and cons, the logistics, and all around feasibility.  But my heart was telling me to go… my soul was crying out, go Alex… face the fear!  And when my pre-determined notions of New York started to dissipate I realized it was not only the perfect timing but also made perfect sense. 

I have an amazing community in Ann Arbor full of artistic people who are willing to help, the story is set here, the local Hospital is a great springboard, and ultimately I’m doing everything I’ve always wanted… writing, acting, performing… just not in New York, or not yet.  I haven’t really written about this but as most of you know my voice is what used to define me.  Everyday my thoughts were consumed with singing, and honestly they still are.  But a giant shift happened when I lost it all and I went from a narcissistic performer to one who now realizes that everyone in this world is blessed with certain gifts, and those gifts should be used to better humanity.   Somewhere along the way I lost that clarity, then when I lost my voice, I started to believe all the Doctors who were saying, “you may never sing again.”  Again, fear.  But then I reminded myself of the power of the mind, shifted my focus, and started telling myself, I can singI will sing for other people.  Once my mind committed to the affirmation, my body began to respond.  Of course it’s a process, but I am singing again! 

So not only will I be here producing the world premiere of MY OTHER VOICE but I’ll also be joining the class of 2013 for the Senior Showcase this year.  I’ll finally have the chance to showcase in New York and will also have a wonderful show that’s been produced as well.  Now, I’m not expecting the Showcase to dramatically change my life, it’s not about that… it’s about accomplishing something that was taken away from me.  It’s about moving past Doctors telling me I’d never sing again and proving once and for all that you can do anything you put your mind to.  The expectations are unimportant, but the clarity, focus and peace of mind are.  

So Ann Arbor, here I come… Again!  But this time not as a selfish student only concerned with himself: instead, as a vehicle of hope, inspiration, and knowledge.    

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From Susan Jeffers, “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyways:” 

“Truth 1. The fear will never go away as long as I continue to grow.
Truth 2. The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it.
Truth 3. The only way to feel better about myself is to go out… and do it.
Truth 4. Not only am I going to experience fear whenever I’m on unfamiliar territory, but so is everyone else.
Truth 5. Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness.”

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