Faith is Starting

"As your faith is strengthened you will find that there is no longer the need to have a sense of control, that things will flow as they will, and that you will flow with them, 

to your great delight and benefit."

-Emmanuel Teney

“Sometimes beautiful things come into our lives out of nowhere. We can't always understand them, but we have to trust in them. I know you want to question everything, 

                                          but sometimes it pays to just have a little faith.”

― Lauren Kate, Torment

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Why is having faith so hard sometimes?  I mean, we’re all taught to have faith in our dreams, to really go for it… “Leap, and the net will appear (John Burroughs)!” Ah, it sounds so beautiful, right?  But then somewhere along the way we start to think, “well yeah, but there’s no way.”  But why?  These aren’t just fancy quotes by fancy people; these are people who have achieved by leaping.  The miracles in their lives are just as real as anything else.

Recently, I’ve really been trying to live in faith that all will be provided if I’m acting in a way that helps others.  Half the time I write about this to keep reminding myself.  When I first decided to come to Ann Arbor with my play MY OTHER VOICE, there was no road map, blueprint, or gps.  However, there was a final destination… yet, plugging in a final destination to your phone and then having it say “network error” is not always the most comforting.  But you know you have to get there, somehow. 

I talk a lot about trusting, believing, the power of positivity, and all of that so now I’m putting my philosophies where my mouth is.  This journey I’m on to make this show happen at the Arthur Miller Theatre is about more than me.  This show is about an entire generation that is just now starting to get a voice…. the young adult cancer population.  We’re starting to be heard and our voices are getting stronger.  I came here with one goal and it will be done… how?  I have no idea!  And I still don’t really.  Every day the Universe, God, whatever you want to call it, is revealing more and more to me. 

Obviously, I came to Ann Arbor with a plan.  I never blindly go into anything without first giving it careful consideration, but already that plan is morphing and shifting into possibilities that I couldn’t have imagined.  I started with this indiegogo campaign, which has already seen enormous support thanks to many of you!  We’ve still got time left to reach our goal and this is only one small piece of the puzzle:  http://bit.ly/VUH67R

The ideas started there and then opportunities started presenting themselves.  Last weekend, I had the great privilege to meet with the President of the University Musical Society (http://www.ums.org), Ken Fischer, over coffee at Starbucks.  The meeting was set up by a chance run in through somehow who knew about my show, which lead to a meeting with him.   UMS has a huge presence at Michigan and is responsible for bringing in major acts like Audra McDonald, The Royal Shakespeare Company, Yo-Yo Ma, and the list goes on.  When I was student here I remember reaping all of the benefits, one of which was sitting three rows back center stage watching Patrick Stuart play Anthony in ANTHONY AND CLEOPATRA!  Well, last weekend the man responsible for all of these wonderful triumphs was talking with me about my show.  Now, before I got here I would have never assumed we would be having coffee discussing my show, but there we were rattling off ideas and possibilities for MY OTHER VOICE.

That meeting then led to a lunch yesterday with the associate producer of the original SWEENY TODD, Judy Dow Rumelhart.  Interestingly, she was my scholarship donor and provided me the opportunity to go here when I was a student.  Did I ever think we’d be sitting down at lunch talking about a show I had written?  No, of course not!  She was merely an untouchable amazing woman I used to write thank you letters to for her support.  Obviously, the letters haven’t stopped but the subject matter has changed. 

Now, finally I’m beginning to talk with a few doctors at the University Hospital who are deeply connected to The Medical Arts Programs at the University of Michigan.  “The Program’s aim is to enhance the ability of medical students, interns, and residents to provide high-quality, humanistic clinical care through experiences and analysis of the musical, dramatic, literary, and visual arts (http://themedicalarts.med.umich.edu).”  BAM!  This is exactly what my show and production company is aiming to do… make better Doctors, residents, and smarter patients.  Did I have any idea that this program existed before I got here?  No! 

And still even now, all of these meetings, upcoming discussions, and talks are seeds being watered.  Yes, more is being revealed but how this puzzle piece is going to come together is still not concrete… and that’s ok.  I’m trusting that that is ok.  Faith is starting.   

Is there something you’ve wanted to do for a while now?  How can you step out in faith?  I’d love to hear! 

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Drive Past "How."

Why do we sometimes become numb in the wake of our greatest opportunities?  When our desires start manifesting often it can be scary or overwhelming.  Suddenly our minds start racing with endless scenarios, routes, and roadblocks that don’t even exist.  We immediately start panicking and exhausting our peace over the very thing that should be bringing us bliss.  But why?  Well, if you’re like me maybe you’re caught up in the “how” of it all. 

So often when we have some giant venture approaching we become paralyzed by the daunting question, “how?”  How am I ever going to get this done? How am I ever going to find the time?  HOW!!  Well, first off, by not asking “how” is how you’ll get it done.  When we ask “how” constantly we’re not trusting in what we’ve set out for ourselves, or more importantly what our desires are revealing to us.  No one ever knows how anything is going to get done because the how is unimportant.  The “do” is… the action of making it happen.  Sounds so simple but it’s hard to put into practice. 

Think of driving in the dark.  When you’re driving home from work late at night you know that home is the final destination.  Now, before you get in the car you don’t stop and think, “how the hell am I going to get home!? It’s so dark!”  You just start driving.  Your headlights can only reveal so much road before you… your headlights can’t see 20 miles ahead of your car, but you continue to journey home taking the road one mile at a time.  You know where you’re headed and yes you can’t see the path in front of you, but your headlights reveal more and more of the road as you go.  You are driving!   

We have to be drivers!  Once you start driving you find that it’s not nearly as bad as you thought.  But we have to be willing to start the car and go.  Throw the car in reverse, put your foot on the pedal… easy!  See, we don’t even think about it, we just do.  We venture out into the darkness knowing we will reach our destination.  Our headlights will reveal the way home one-mile at a time.  Why can’t our work of manifesting our desires be the same way?  You know what you want… that’s what matters.  If you know what you want in your life, that’s where you start.  The drive to that destination will be revealed one mile at a time.  Don’t get overwhelmed by the big picture or the “how,” just focus on the first thing in front of you.  Inevitably that will lead somewhere else which will lead somewhere else, and so on. 

Know what you want and start building it one task at a time.  There is no “how” or “when” because everything will be revealed in good time if you are in line with your desires.  Just like Rihanna said, “Baby, you got the keys.  Now shut up and drive!”  Oh yeah, I went there!  Maybe it won’t be as scary as you thought, or maybe it’s more terrifying than you ever imagined!  Either way you’ll have learned something and will forever be changed.  How can you take action today towards your greatest opportunity?  I’d love to hear in the comments.

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“The best way out is always through” - Robert Frost

“Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking.” -William B. Sprague